The axioms of communication that I will further discuss fall under interpersonal communication. Interpersonal communication is necessary to understand in order to see how Paul Watzlawick's theory fits into this type of communication. First of all, "Interpersonal communication (IPC) examines how people in relationships talk to one another, why they select the messages they select, and the effect the messages have on the relationship and the individuals"
(McDermott 546). McDermott further goes on to say that along with analyzing how communication can influence others, IPC throughly questions why people communicate the way they do.

Paul Watzlawick greatly studied communication techniques and relationship maintenence as a part of the cybernetic tradition. In the interactional view, relationships are subject to change at any time, and in order to keep them healthy, one must talk about the way they communicate. All communication is based on content and relationship and Watzlawick studied how these aspects make up the relational process. He also stressed the family system and saw that it was more important looking at how an individual's behavior affects a group setting. With the combined efforts of Don Jackson and Janet Beavin, Watzlawick's key axioms of human communication are:

1. "The axioms comprise the rules of the game.
2. Games are sequences of behavior governed by rules.
3. Each family plays a one-of-a-kind game with homemade rules and creates its own reality" ("View Resources by Theory (7th Edition).").

He also coined five axioms that make up interpersonal communication. However, the first four are gone into the most depth and clearly show what reigns true in every relationship. The first axiom is: One cannot not communicate. This is saying that communication occurs no matter what, whether it be through words, facial expressions, tone, or body language. He also adds a corollary to this axiom that says, "one cannot not influence" (Griffin). This shows that communication influences people and even one statement or movement can influence another to feel a certain way. The next axiom is: Communication equals content plus relationship. Therefore, regardless of the communication method, things are said and they're said in a certain way. The third axiom is: "The nature of a relationship depends on how both parties punctuate the communication sequence" (Griffin 183). This can cause conflict because in a relationship each person may punctuate an interaction differently. As it's mentioned in A First Look At Communication Theory, "Punctuation becomes a problem when each person sees himself or herself as only reacting to, rather than provoking, a cyclical conflict" (Griffin 183). The final axiom I will talk about is that all communication is either symmetrical or complementary. This axiom is to show that there can be different levels of power in a relationship, whether that be equal power for all parties, or an individual exerting more control than another. Edna Rogers and Richard Farace created a coding system to put the different types of control intro categories. These are: "One-up communication seeks to control the exchange, one-down communication yields control, one-across communication neutralizes control, and bids for dominance do not necessarily result in control of the interaction" ("View Resources by Theory (7th Edition).").

To learn more about Paul Watzlawick's axioms of communication view an excerpt of: Theorizing Communication

Also, other theories that fall under interpersonal communication can be seen in the following Encyclopedia of Communication Theory article:

Interpersonal Communication

Axiom 1: One Cannot Not Communicate

     Oftentimes when someone does not want to talk about a certain situation they avoid communicating or use an excuse such as saying, "I'm sick". Using "something that renders communication justifiably impossible" such as sickness or sleepiness is known as symptom strategy (Griffin 183). In Pretty Little Liars, this happens many times because the characters are constantly keeping secrets. Hanna avoids talking about her break up when her mother asks and Aria hides her relationship with Ezra by changing the subject when he is brought up in conversation. Even Aria's brother, Mike, constantly avoids confrontation with his parents about his anger problems and his lack of effort in school, often going to his room and saying "I'm fine" to avert from discussion. However there are nonverbal cues that communicate feelings, opinions, or events because even silence has an impact. Facial expressions also can speak just as loud as words and therefore avoiding all these different types of communication is impossible.
     In the Pretty Little Liars scene shown below, Hanna's mom, Ashley, asks Hanna about a crime she was accused of committing and about someone who is potentially framing her. Hanna avoids the topic by saying they don't need to talk about it. After, when her mom asks if she in fact committed the crime she doesn't respond and instead starts crying. This type of nonverbal communication speaks to Ashley and she leaves the room because Hanna's crying gives her the impression that she is in fact guilty. Despite not saying anything, Hanna's crying communicates in spite of this.

Axiom 2: Communication = Content + Relationship

In Watzlawick's second axiom, it is important to know what he means by content and relationship.

Content- "The report part of a message; what is said verbally.
Relationship- The command part of the message; how it's said nonverbally"
(Griffin 184).

 
       









In the above chart taken from Em Griffin's 'A First Look at Communication Theory', the content and relationship levels of communication are displayed. As seen at the bottom of the chart, Watzlawick coined the phrase metacommunication, meaning "communication about communication" (Griffin 184). This relational aspect of interaction involves talking about patterns of communication and is important in families that are having trouble. Metacommunication is necessary in the discussion so that it allows the family to rebuild itself and fix its current issues.
     In Pretty Little Liars, Aria's family is having the most trouble. This is seen through Aria's dad, Byron, cheating on her mom, Ella, which causes them to live apart. Mike, Aria's brother, also has behavioral problems and has robbed several homes which angers and confuses both parents. Finally, Aria's romantic relationship with her teacher brings the family conflict to a new level and the family is constantly arguing and quickly falling apart. It is not until the scene shown below that their ways of communicating are discussed. Mike talks to Byron about the way he thinks his father should communicate with Aria. Talking about more effective ways to communicate between each other is what helps Aria's family get back on the right track in solving their many problems.

Axiom 3: The Nature of a Relationship Depends on How Both Parties Punctuate the Communication Sequence

     Punctuation is defined as, "interpreting an ongoing sequence of events by labeling one event as the cause and the following event as the response" (Griffin 185). In a relationship, individuals sometimes interpret the cause and response differently. One person may think their action is only the effect of what the other person did. An example of this is described by psychotherapist R.D. Laing in his book Knots. The book demonstrates many different situations of relationships in knots. One such knot, is displayed through a couple in which a man is unhappy and the woman is unhappy when he is unhappy. Then the man feels guilty if she is not happy and she feels unhappy because she wants them both to be happy. This knot is very complicated and punctuation plays its role in that she thinks she gets depressed by his guilt, however he feels he gets guilty when she is depressed. Therefore, they punctuate their causes and responses differently, which causes conflict.

     The above chart displays the couple's sequence of interaction and where each the man and woman punctuate their interactions. The man punctuates his with the letters q and s and the woman punctuates hers at p, r, and t. As you can see, both punctuate the opposite of each other.
   
Many more of these knotted situations and disputes of punctuation can be seen in Laing's novel here: Knots: Preview.

    Through the TV show Pretty Little Liars, Aria and both of her parents punctuate their interactions differently. This is seen when Ella and Byron have separated but then start sneaking to see each other behind their children's backs. Aria asks both of her parents questions about where they've been because she thinks they are guilty of something. However both Ella and Byron feel they show guilt after Aria questions them. Therefore Aria and Byron and similarly Aria and Ella would punctuate their interactions differently. Aria would say her parents' guilt is the cause, and questioning them is her response. Byron and Ella would punctuate the interaction by saying Aria's questions are the cause of their uneasiness. In the following scenes, you can see how Aria's parents react to her speculations and Aria's reaction to how jumpy her parents seem.

Axiom 4: All Communication is Either Symmetrical or Complementary

     According to Watzlawick, all communication is symmetrical meaning "based on equal power" or complementary which is "based on differences in power" (Griffin 186). In a symmetrical interchange, one individual does not have more dominance than the other. Often times the two individuals excel in different areas and therefore there isn't strong competition against the other. However in complementary interchanges, one person has more control than the other, and the difference in power is accepted and acknowledged. This is the case with parent-child relationships or relationships that are dominant-submissive. These types of relationships that have an unequal distribution of power are sometimes extremely harmful. This can be seen with "toxic friendships" as spoken of in a Seventeen Magazine article that can be read here: Toxic Friends Article. The Seventeen article even contains a picture of Alison DiLaurentis from Pretty Little Liars  (pictured below) to show an example of the typical toxic friend.

    Alison's friendships with Hanna, Aria, and Emily are complementary. She controls the three of them, often forcing them to lie or act in a certain way. Alison thinks she is of higher status in the group than the other girls and often pokes fun at Hanna about her weight and threatens Spencer to get her to do what she wants. However, Spencer doesn't accept this complementary relationship and often uses one-up communication "to gain control of the exchange" (Griffin 186). This move is used in conversation to try to dominate what is being said and is often marked by orders, interruptions, or contradictions. In the following scene, Spencer uses one-up communication to show Ali that she isn't any better than the rest of the girls.

To learn more about the TV Show Pretty Little Liars or to watch more clips and full episodes visit: ABC Family - Pretty Little Liars.